THE POWER OF WORDS AND LANGUAGE
Parents, Teachers, Pastors,... All Should Take Responsibility

I got back into Seoul Saturday night after an uncomfortable flight from Chicago. During my sixteen hour ride to Korea, I had a lot of time to reflect upon my various encounters and discussions during my month long trip in the U.S. One topic was the power of words and the influence words have on human behavior, life perspectives, and the general impact upon a person. This was interesting to me because part of my professional training through the Coro Fellowship was based on the importance of words, how a person communicates, and how to incorporate other views outside of your own life experience and comfort zones. To simpify even further, probably the two most important statements I could draw from this leadership program were:

"Everything is done through relationships."

"You can create the future through language."

The latter statement emphasizes the impact words have in the world around us, but many people do not realize the direct importance of their words. If you do, I am not saying you're in an elite group since about a third of the U.S. population believe professional wrestling is real. This is just something people might know, but don't actually make the direct correlation. Words can create or change the environment around a person.

Even looking in the Bible, the importance of "words" is stated by Jesus Christ being called "the Word" in John 1:1-14.

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning... The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us."

As one commentator states, "God was a mystery until he broke silence. He spoke once, and all creation sprang to life, quasars, oceans, whales, giraffes, orchids, and beetles. He spoke again, says John, and this time the Word took the form of a man, Jesus Christ."

Going down several levels of the abstraction ladder, if during my initial meeting with a person I said, "You are an idiot and the ugliest mother I have ever seen. (pause) I'm just joking."

No matter how I apologize, I can safely assume that I and almost anything associated with me will be seen in a negative manner for a long time, if not forever, from that person. Along the same lines, my close friend, who's a pastor, was telling me that his neighbors were turned off from organized religion after attending a church that ostracized their daugther who came out of the closet during high school and stated her homosexuality. What was the purpose of ostracizing this young girl? If the purpose of that church and its leaders were to "save" that girl's soul, shouldn't they seek to provide comfort and understanding? Being an outcast would only create bitterness or negative feelings. Self-righteousness sometimes creates the stupidest and most selfish forms of human behavior.

I assume at the least it was a snide remark here or trails of gossip there, which led to bitterness being created and emotional scars formed within this family. Looking towards another institution, schools, you can find how important words are. In the manner in which they are spoken and what is stated is very important to students. What can be the difference in a student's life? A good and caring teacher. What makes a good teacher?

As you probably know, teacher's expectations of students can greatly effect their performance. Decades ago and probably even now, many African American children were automatically viewed as lesser students, so their performance was poor. They were talked to as lesser students and taught as "slow learners." A simple change in perspective by teachers have created dramatic improvements in student performance, and this was proven in numerous studies and programs.

But these experiences are not only limited to institutions, such as churches and schools, but in the homes of families. Parents' words can hugely affect a child's growth and development. If a parent routinely calls his or her child "stupid" or uses harsh tones frequently, would these methods not have a negative effect on that child's personality, happiness, or development? How bitter, insecure, or under-achieving might this child become?

I was strong, brash leader during my high school and college years. At times, I wouldn't care for what other people thought or felt. It made me cringe, and it still does, when I heard people blame "society" for an individual's actions, crimes, or misdeeds. If someone was offended in the manner in which I spoke, I would discount it as "being too sensitive" or "not being able to hear the core message" of whatever I said. I realize now that I lacked insight into the power of my words or words in general. In the same manner in which I believed people should take responsibility for their actions, I now realize how people should take responsibility for what they say and how they say it. It is not as tangible as a hit to the cheek or the stealing of money, but words have more of an impact than I could ever measure or conceive.

So it does matter how parents speak with their children, what a teacher says to his or her student, or the manner in which a pastor presents the gospel to his congregation. The power of words should not be ignored or taken for granted. It is a continual exercise in life to improve upon how you speak and what you say, and your words and language are some reflection of your heart, soul, and mind.

"And while I thus spoke, did there not cross your mind some thought of the physical power of words? Is not every word an impulse on the air?" - Agathos, The Power of Words by Edgar Allan Poe