DECEPTION CAN COME FROM THE LEAST EXPECTED PLACES...

Continuing a trend of three crazy weekends in Seoul, my friend got married and another had a birthday party on the same day. The wedding was beautiful, short and sweet. Andy, the groom, was sweating up a storm during the ceremony and then he stops sweating as soon as everything is done. Rattled nerves or something... I would have just been sweating throughout and afterwards. Overweight people sweat easier, which I soon found out after college. It doesn't matter whether I'm stressed or anxious, I just sweat when the temperature climbs slightly above room temperature.

Anyway, my other friend, Sunwoo, turned 34, but he looks like 50 years old... just kidding, Mike. Since he's the most infamous alcohol pushers in Seoul people wanted to take him down. Payback for all the livers he's damaged and times he pushed others to drink without drinking with them. But some of our friends were out of the country and others were too tired from a baseball game. I got to the party late after the wedding party and I gave him a couple shots, but he told me that he was drunk. I was uncertain, but just took his word. The next day I found out from my friend, Jimmy, that Mike was holding the alcohol in his mouth for a minute and then spitting it out when people weren't looking. I think Mike is in trouble the next we go out. But this deception was almost expected.

It's from the least expected sources that always knock you a few steps back. Andy had a few friends visiting from the U.S., classmates from college, and one of them knew my good friend, Paulo. As soon as I mentioned Paulo's name, the guy started saying, "He was a badass. One time at a Tae Kwon Do tournament Paulo was sending people out on stretchers."

"Really?! I never knew..."

I was somewhat surprised since Paulo never mentioned this side of his past. For the past three years I have known him, I only see Paulo as this mild-mannered, gentle soul. He's Brazilian without the machismo. He's Mr. Brady with a latin flair... Doogie Howser but older and in finance... Will (from Will & Grace) but hetero and the same taste for style. Above all, his integrity is sound. Honest to the bone and no intent for deception.

"Dude, Paulo was a white belt in Tae Kwon Do and was killing all the other white and yellow belts in this tournament... but get this! He was a black belt in Karate! Hahahaha... How badass is that!... First fight he came in, took and few swings and then, 'WHACK!'... The guy was knocked out and had to be carried out on a stretcher. Our team was going crazy and the other teams were freaked out. 'That's their white belt, then how good are the others?'"

The shock of Paulo's deception sent a shiver down my spine. It was like Billy Graham lying to the church. My faith in people was shaken. If a man such as Paulo could deceive as such, then no man is safe from deception's call.

I was going to rip and rag on him for months :)

So I called him and started my barrage.

Paulo responds, "Hey, I wasn't a black belt. I was a blue belt. That's like almost a yellow... Come one, man! Stop it! It wasn't like that..."

Paulo must of forgotten that I took seven plus years of martial arts. It depends on the martial art and how much money the school wants to make by adding the various colors of the rainbow, but generally blue is where the separation begins from yellow. This is where your intermediate skills are far greater than the beginners. Paulo was just adding to his deception in nervous defense.

This was too good to pass up. I kept laughing inside. I crack myself up easily, so I just started to laugh more at the possible avenues of taunting and embarrassment I could deliver to my close and dear friend. You reading this, Paulo?